Journal Entry

Just got back from Lawrence, KS, which is my hometown. It’s amazing how “the same, but different” is such a good description for so many things. That’s exactly how Lawrence felt. So similar in so many ways to the place I grew up, but different.

The trip was to go to my grandmother’s funeral, so it wasn’t exactly a super fun time. But it was great in its own way. Most of our family all stayed in an AirBNB together, it was kind of nice to feel like we were back at home, in Lawrence, 20 years ago.

Man, time is such an asshole. Why does it need to keep moving? Wouldn’t it be cool if we could just stop it for a while, just sort of hang out in a moment. I keep thinking of those moments that have just slipped through my fingers.

We drove to Kansas and back. It has been so long since I’ve been on a roadtrip, and that specific roadtrip – between Colorado and Kansas – is surely my most travelled single route in my life. I’ve been making that trip since I was six years old. I love that trip. It’s so full of memory, so relaxing.

One thing that I’ve been thinking about my Grandma is how content she was. She had every reason to be bitter and angry, but she wasn’t. She was so strong. I am trying to learn how to be more like that: to enjoy where I am currently, rather than trying to force some change, or try to be someone else. It’s easier said than done. Just how I look so fondly back on different times of my life, I will definitely do the same thing to my life now. I should learn to enjoy it, rather than constantly trying to change what’s happening in my life.