Grandmother

Oh, the cuckoo, she’s a pretty bird,
Lord, she warbles as she flies;
She’ll never say cuckoo
’Til the fourth day of July.

Wu Zihan rolled her eyes and loaded up the last of the cargo as the song played from Shaconage’s Daughter. The sweet smell of woodsmoke hung heavy in the air and Zihan’s clothes stuck to her skin. To be stuck for an entire spaceflight, an entire lifetime, her entire lifetime, with these backwoods, ignorant hillbillies. It was going to be a long lifetime.

Zihan couldn’t complain though, she thought she might miss this Exodus. All of the big ones had already left, and all that were left were ships like Shaconage’s Daughter: cramped, hastily assembled, second rate. Her father had pleaded with her to go on one of the big ones, like The New Sun or The Invincibility of Buddhism. She was going to. But that was before he got sick.

She could hear someone whispering in the corner. “God dammit Ezra, she’s the only one we got you can’t insult her.” “Restless, don’t you think I know that? It’s not an insult it’s a fucking senior moment.”

Zihan smiled.

“My esteemed shipmates, of need something?” She layed the accent on extra thick, speaking as formally as she knew how in this language, and slipping in a benign grammatical error. She had found the mixture potent in easing fears and imprinting herself as the lovable foreigner, rather than the scary one.

Ezra fumbled with his words for a moment, then looked up at Zihan, “Well ma’am, we are so appriciative of everything you are doing to help get us ready. We really are.”

Pause.

“It’s just that we are having an awfully hard time getting some of our shy friends on this boat.”

Zihan didn’t say anything. Ezra hadn’t actually asked her anything yet, but she thought she could guess what he needed.

“We need you to leave.” Zihan’s eyes widened and she let out a hurt little gasp, thrown off by his bluntness.

Restless stared daggers at Ezra and hit him in the arm.

“Zihan, dear. Please ignore my esteemed husband’s tragic social skills.” She looked his way again, fury in her eyes, “What he means to say is, could you please get started on the navigation checks in the cockpit? Some of our more hermeted spirits are wary of people they don’t know, and we’re having trouble getting them onto the ship.”

Zihan walked deeper into the ship, past the salt line out of the cargo bay, and headed to the cockpit to begin the warm up procedure. She saw Restless hit Ezra again, this time a little harder.

—

“That one actually hurt!” Ezra half shouted at Restless. “Good,” came the predictable reply. All of this was so delicate, the last thing that Restless needed was for Ezra to say some boneheaded thing and lose them their only hope off this rock.

She looked around her, at the sturdy ship. It wasn’t as big as it could have been, but her people had never needed flashy things. No, Shacanoge’s Daughter would do just fine. Almost 30,000 souls had boarded this ship already, and were hibernating now. When they saw light again, it would be another star, another planet. Strange light, strange skies, strange lands. That’s why this final phase of boarding was so important. They could not take all of their gods with them, but for the ones that could come, they needed them.

Convincing spirits to follow you to an unknown planet is no easy feat. Well, you can get some to follow you pretty easy, but those generally aren’t the ones you want. Spirits are tied to the land in a way that we simply can’t grasp, and to have any hope at all you have to bring the land with you. Which is why they spent so much time turning the cargo hold into a nature sanctuary. The floor was covered in moss, spruce saplings dotted the floor. It smelled like the forest.

They had lured Half Moon Boy in easy enough, he thought this all was just a game anyway. His playfulness was often mistaken by those not familiar with him for malice. Sure, once or twice his pranks had gone too far, like with that family visiting from out west. But they broke the rules, if they had followed the rules they would have been just fine.

The Willow, as old and wise as she was, could not bear to see us depart, and joined right away as well. Of course, she would not come without Pestulence, and so they found a bloated, maggot-filled rotting deer carcass and shoved it in some corner. That was not a fun job, not at all.

And so it was, one by one, for most of the spirits. They made deals, they made sacrificies, they consulted the old men and women, each familiar with their local spirit’s desires, quirks, and triggers, and they invited them all to go with them. It’s a good thing that so few are corporeal, or else they’d never all fit in that place.

Through it all, Restless knew that She would be the last to come. As they were loading everyone on, so many people reminded Restless and Ezra: we cannot leave without Mother.

Ezra was the first to spot her, 5 days ago, at the edge of the clearing. A bear, black as night, walking unnaturally, on her hind legs. Ezra bowed, and when he looked up, he saw the woman with a void where her eyes should be. Mother.

That night, they danced naked under the moon. They lit the incense, they slaughtered the livestock and gathered the blood. Enough to make a path, from the edge of the forest to the cargo hold of the ship. Mother watched, but she did not come.

It was the same the next day, and then the next as well. They pleaded, they cried, they soaked themselves in bile and blood and didn’t wash for 3 days. All the while, Mother watched, but she did not come.

It was Ezra who gave up first. “She isn’t coming with us,” he said, hopeless and lost. “How can we do this without Mother? How can any of us expect to make it?”

Restless was so angry she could have killed him. To even say the words, to suggest that Mother would not join them. It was not just wrong, it was blasphemy. They all had sworn not to leave without her.

But here they were, almost ready to launch, and there Mother was, standing just outside the cargo bay. A single tear of blood marked her face.

“Mother,” gasped Ezra, quiet. She glared at him and he shrank away. She looked at Restless, looked her in the eyes. Restless felt a terrible chill. Mother had never been angry with her before. Restless had seen her angry, sure, but always it was the protective, rightous anger of a mother bear protecting her young.

Restless could not bear to look into that void where eyes should be. But she couldn’t look away either. She tried to pull her gaze to something else, to anything, but she could not. She did notice, out of her peripheral vision, that the deer carcass had somehow made it’s way to her side, standing.

“No,” Ezra said. “Please, no. Don’t leave.” Restless understood as she felt a chill breeze on her back, coming from the cargo hold. Mother wasn’t coming, and she wasn’t letting anybody else go, either. Restless started crying, “Mother! Please, I beg you. We must leave, or we will all die.”

Without sound, Mother said, “Then die.”

She turned her back to the ship, and a black bear began to walk away from them. Restless hung her head. Ezra was crumpled on the ship floor, sobbing to himself.

Restless heard bounding footsteps behind her, and Zihan rushed out of the ship. “Girl, no!” she cried, but Zihan either didn’t hear her or didn’t listen. She rushed at the black bear, and Restless knew what would happen to her as she grabbed the bears fur. She could not bear to look as it turned around, making an unfathomable cry and knocking Zihan to her back.

It was silent for a moment, as Mother looked down at the girl before her. The stranger, who would take away her children. She tore Zihan’s clothes as her claws bore into her, and Zihan let out a cry of pain. Mother turned around, and bounded away.

Ezra ran to Zihan to help, but before he made it out of the cargo hold, the girl was back to her feet.

Zihan ran after the bear, and again grabbed Mother’s fur. This time, Mother did not stop, and simply swatted at her and pushed her away. Zihan again cried out as she fell on the wet grass.

At this, Restless’s reverie was broken, and she yelled to Zihan, “Stop girl! You are a stranger here, and Mother will kill you!” She leapt after the the girl, suprising even herself with her speed.

But Zihan was already on her feet too, and again she ran after the bear, but when she got close instead of grabbing the fur, she dove to her feet, toppling her to the ground.

Restless stared in horror. Mother would never forgive this disrespect. She ran toward them, “Mother please! She doesn’t know what she is doing! Mother, please have mercy!”

The bear was gone, and in its place the woman with no eyes stared at Zihan with hatred and murder. She crawled to the girl, who was still on her stomach, crying. Sobbing. Pleading. Mother reached out to the girl, gently, and put her arms around her neck.

“Grandmother don’t you recognise me?” Zihan sobbed. “You must know me. I am Wu Zihan.” She gasped for air, not because she was being choked, but because of her crying.

“I know it is you! You came every spring to our village. When you visted us, the pear trees would blossom.” She sobbed again, tears soaking her face. “I am sorry I had to leave! I didn’t want to! But we always would leave fresh pig blood for you when we came back.”

It was very silent. Mother did not take her hands from Zihan’s throat. But she didn’t tighen them either. She looked in Zihan’s eyes for a long while. It was silent, not even the other spirits made a move.

Then Zihan kissed — kissed! — mother, and fell to her feet. “Please, please come with us. If you are worried for the others that remain, they do not remain. They have already left, as well all must. At home, they still have Grandfather, and many others who could not fit on board. But we, we need you. Who knows what spirits will be there when we get off the ship. We need you to protect us.”

Mother stared at Ezra and to Restless, who were too shocked to say anything. Restless just nodded, dumbly. Mother turned around, looked to the woods, and then looked back again. She looked down at the girl, bloody, crumpled at her feet.

And she walked to the cargo bay.